A Recipe for Being Miserable

Taken from Grandma's Old Recipebook

Start of with a big cup entitlement. Go through life believing that the world owes you something. Pretend as though you have signed a contract at birth, that secured the responsibility of the world for taking care of your happiness. So, when things don't go the way you want them to, get angry at the world for rudely breaching contract. Claim the world is being unfair and out to get you. Firmly believe in your victimhood, and disregard the fact that the world hasn't promised you shit.

Add a dash of judgement to give the entitlement a bit more jazz. Judge everything and everyone you see. Don't you dare emphatize or put yourself in their shoes. Like you would want to step in those cheap-looking, bad-smelling pieces of trash anyway. You'd probably get five infections from looking at them.

Continue with three spoons of envy. Notice everything others have that you don't. Count them, catogorise them and create a whole list of it. Lose eye for the things you do have, because they're not as shiny and green as on the other side. Put the list on your fridge, on your favourite Edward Cullen poster and tattoo it on your skin. Never forget, or let it out of your sight.

Add some self-absorption to the brew. Disregard everybody else on this planet, and ignore the other planets as well. When it's raining, it's  your hair that gets messed up. So can that old lady please stop whining about her pneumonia? When you're mom is making spaghetti the second night in a row, understand that this is probably the most unfair thing in the world. She knows you don't like her meatballs. Ignore the starving people in other parts of the world. At least they don't have to eat meatballs twice in a row.

Sprinkle some resentment on top. Resent everything. Nothing is ever the way you want it to be. Get annoyed by everything, so you'll never feel inner peace. Get annoyed by people's voices, tv commericals, the colour yellow and Josef Stalins mustache. Let these annoyances simmer in the back of your mind at all times. Whenever you feel happy, think about the colour yellow and be reminded that happiness does not exist. See Josef Stalin's mustache everywhere.

Now, add three tea cups of iron-clutched issues. Never let things go Hold on to everything that has ever made you feel down. Always think of the things you should have done. Go through all the possible scenarios and never forgive yourself for making the other, and therefore wrong, choice. Let the what-ifs of life envelop you and swallow you whole. Obsessively overanalyze the time you dropped your lollipop when you were twelve. It taught you how nothing ever lasts.

Tip: If you've had a crappy childhood, this part is really easy. Blame your parents for everything, and be constantly reminded on how crappy they are. Bad day? Because your Mom forgot to buy you strawberry icecream when you were nine. Bad haircut? It's because your father never showed appreciation for your interest in otters. Ripped tights? Your Mom didn't understand your haikus.

Mix all these ingredients down to tasty dough, put it in the oven and late it back. Congratulations, this way you will be miserable in everything you ever do.

Nietzsche and Rain

One downside, of the very many downsides, of living in Holland, is that the weather has a nasty moodswing problem. This can not be innocent.  I sincerely believe there is a diabolical plot in this somewhere, and the weather forecast is secretly conspiring with the weather gods ( which I'm guessing are Zeus and Taylor Swift, who can have it rain whenever she feels something emotional is about to happen) to break everybody's fragile spirits.

This morning, I woke up with the sun streaming through my blinds. Let this be a lesson to you; never trust the morning sun. It's an elaborate lie. You see, as I was glancing out of my windows at this yellow beast, I didn't know the sun was trying to set me up. The morning sun was so brazen, I had even decided against wearing a jacket.

Yes, I'm aware that that's stupid. Unfortunately, this entire week has been filled with stupid decisions as such. Why not go to bed at two am when I have to get up at six? Why not miss the bus in favor of my morning coffee? Why wear a jacket during autumn? Why take notes when I can just stare blankly at the teacher? Why not agree to have coffee with the creepy German guy who has had a past with stalking me? The only thing missing from this list is: why be a civilized member of society when you can also go around stabbing everyone?
Thankfully, I am not that stage. Yet.

The point is, the sun fooled me. I had my mind set on a sunny day, and all I got was rain in return. Yes, I am a fan of metaphors the way thirteen-year-olds are a fan of Justin Bieber. My notebooks are also filled with I <3 Metaphors.

To make it more obvious, there is a metaphor in the weather-line. Sometimes metaphors just aren't enough. And that was a metaphor too. INCEPTION.

There was literal rain too, today. Sometimes the weather is very accomodating towards my life events. But you know those days when anything, anything at all, can make you reach unknown levels of rage. Like, someone has to sneeze in your direction and all your suppressed rage comes boiling out? Today was one of those days. Though, to be fair, there was justified reasoning behind my outburst as well.   But it was all so very high school. Typical trash talking reaches its tipping point, and you want to stop the pretense and just be a complete raging bitch in their face intead of behind it. So, I did.  I am not known for being nice. In fact, when I stop being my level of nice, and go full-blown bitch, Cruella Deville can take pointers from me. Unfortunately, when the beast is out, it is all out.

I literally couldn't be any meaner, or a bigger cliche today. Example: "See, I'm sitting in front of you. That should make it easier for you to talk behind my back."

Maybe I should work on my people skills.

It is raining all weekend. I have to study for three huge tests. This is just the world conspiring against me. I am sure of it.

And to end this happy blog, I present to you a picture of Nietzsche, who is more depressing to hang out with than I am. And trust me, dear readers, that is a true accomplishment.

Look at that mustache, isn't it marvelous?

 “My genius is in my nostrils.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche, Index

The Awesomeness of Jazz Dance

We are very sorry for being so indifferent and vacant, we haven't written in days! weeks! That's not very awesome of us.

The reason for us being so busy is of course SCHOOL. What else sucks the energy out of your body? What else makes the time fly like a dinosaurbird? What else makes you toil everday, everyevening, everynight? SCHOOL is the one and only answer unfortunately.

Luckily school is not only about hard work, it's also where I have my dearest friends, where I socialise and where I , most of the time, have lots and lots of fun!

But school is not the only activity I (Laura) do, for about three years I had acting lessons (which included dancing and singing too!) I did, gymnastics, hockey, judo and jazzdance. Nowadays I only do Jazzdance. I really enjoy Jazzdance, you know, when I was young (eleven) I tried what it was like and after one year I got 'promoted' to the highest level. The highest level means: sponsored clothing, dancing competitions, training more times a week, teamspirit etc.

I must say I'm very proud, our team is a very close group, we accept each and other and we've also won a couple of prizes. We even got to compete in the championships last year!

Dancing is for me something I can look forward to, and if I'm stressed out because of school or other reasons I can 'Dance it off' so to speak. It always cheers me up!

If you do not have an activity you do next to schoolwork, watching tv, facebook, admiring zac efron, polishing your nails, baking cookies or observing clouds, I recommend you start looking for a nice sport or activity that keeps you busy for some time!

 Xx Laura

p.s I wish I was the girl on the picture, but no... i'm not that flexible.

KABOOM!

Totally forgot to add this to my last post "Puppies, kittens and fat asses". This is one of the funniest things I've seen on youtube. And it cheered me up big time when I watched it (guess what I was feeling shitty. I know it may look like I'm the biggest emo excisting. Although I do wear a lot of black, in a fashionably way of course, I am happy most of the time.). I watched every single video by Jabo0odyDubs after that and I couldn't stop crying of laughter.

I present you the very first video I watched by Jabo0odyDubs, which got my hooked and is great cheer-up material: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iOmvdeNa67E



xoxo Enya

Puppies and kittens and fat asses.

Not funny.

It's amazing how attending school can change your life. Well, I mean, of course it changes your life, it's education and all, I know the drill. But what I'm trying to say is that school changes your day-to-day-life and it sucks. Since school has started I haven't been feeling like doing anything besides watching tv and sleeping. Right now, as I'm writing this, I'm watching tv. And because nothing good is on right now, I'm watching Married With Children. And this is not the first time I'm watching it. It's so terrible and I can't believe my parents actually think it is funny. Last week I was watching it with my brother, making fun of it of course, and my father was sitting across the room working. And suddenly he burst out in laughter because he thought it was funny! And why does the audience clap everytime Al Bundy enters the studio EVERY SINGLE EPISODE?! WHY?! HE'S THE MOST ANNOYING ONE OF THE ENTIRE SHOW. Which is really weird because I love him in Modern Family.

Anywho, I thought I should post something to show you that we are still alive. Despite having to go to school. So here are some pictures that cheer you up and you mght want to take a look at if you feel like crap:

A kitten and a puppy, because they are adowable.

A sleeping kitten and a puppy, because they are even more adowable.

This set of photographs of Tom Felton and Rupert Grint, because the pics are cool and they are HOT.

And  this picture because you don't look like him (HER?) and you are beautiful.

And finally this picture of Zac Efron to get that horrible image  out your brain.

Well, that sure cheered me up a bit. I hope it cheered you up as well. And if you weren't feeling like crap before, lucky you. And enjoy!

xoxo Enya

p.s. We would love to hear something from you guys. So feel free to comment! xo

Miss Selena

So I haven't written in quite a while. I went to New York for two weeks with my boo (hihi) in early July. And it was awesome. I had never been to New York before and I've promised myself that I'll go back one day, maybe even to live there for a while. Once I had gotten back home from the Big Apple I had one hell of a jet lag to deal with. Which took me a little more than a week. And right after that I was too depressed that I wasn't in NYC anymore to deal with anything else in my life.

Well, that's not true. Hmm, it's partly true. I'm terrible with school breaks you see. Just terrible. When I have to go to school, I want to do all these other things than going to school but I don't have time to do them because I have to go to school. And when I don't have to go to school, I... well, I don't really do anything. That's probably a thing on my Top Ten Things I Hate About Myself-List. Honestly, I hate it. And I try to change it every time.

I wanted to do so many things this summer. Like painting, biking through the park with just my iPod and my thoughts, reading books for English in advance so I'd have actually read them for a change, cleaning up my room, hanging out with friends and writing for this blog. I cleaned my room, sort of. I'm still half way through the process. I did hang out with friends, once. I started reading To Kill A Mockingbird, I've read exactly 46 pages. And that's basically it. I have no clue how many weeks ago I left New York and what I did during those weeks.

I still have exactly eight days left until school starts. Eight days left to paint, bike, read, clean, hang and write. I  do feel ashamed of being able to plan ahead so many things and not doing any of it in the end. But it's not like the weather is great around here. Today was the first day I could wear shorts since I got back from New York!

I hope you all had or are having a great summer break. And although my summer holiday is almost over, doesn't mean the summer's over. Even though I didn't do many of the things I wanted to do the past couple of weeks, doesn't mean I can't do them once school has started.

xoxo,
Enya

P.S. "Why" you must be wondering "is this post titled 'Miss Selena'?". Well, I shall put you out of your misery and answer your question. Selena Gomez' latest album "When The Sun Goes Down" has been this summer's soundtrack to me. I thought I didn't have anything better to write about than Selena's dance-pop songs about Justin Bieber's swagger, until I realized how I felt about doing nothing this summer vacay.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2

Hello!

Sorry we haven't been posting much, everyone's on holiday right now except me. Awesome, I know. Anyway, I just wanted to get this post done before I leave to go to the south of France after which I go to Scotland for two weeks.

I went to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2, on tuesday and I would like to share my thoughts on it. This post will contain spoilers. If you haven't seen the movie yet and you don't want to know any details, don't read this. Even though you've all read the books so there's no spoiling it, right? Right? Good.

Okay, so I went to the midnight showing of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 on tuesday. It was AWESOME. There were so many people dressed up as characters and wearing wizard robes. It was nerd heaven!
I have to say, i'm less sad about it ending than I thought I would be. I think I really experienced my 'post Harry Potter depression' in 2007 when the last book came out. Even though I love the movies, (I secretly hate them a bit, it's kind of a love hate thing. I can't explain it. So many things are wrong in the films, it irritates me.) I'm not as upset as I was back then. I'm still sad none the less.

Of all the Harry Potter films, I think this was the best one by far. They stayed quite true to the book which I really appreciated but there were things I am super upset about.
I loved the way they fixed the Ron and Hermione kiss, seeing as the reason they kissed in the book would have made no sense in the film. They cleaned that up nicely.
I loved everything that Neville did. Seriously, he was such a boss and really showed his inner Gryffindor and proved the Sorting Hat did not make a mistake. The Gringotts scene was amazing! I loved everything about it.

But I was unhappy about a couple of things, the Harry and Voldemort Stand off for example, IT WASN'T THERE. They were running around Hogwarts having the same epic fight scene they've had in the last couple of films. In the book, when they were circling around each other talking, challenging each other, THAT WAS AMAZING. The suspense was incredible and the whole school was watching in awe. I really missed that in the film, instead they replaced that big ball of awesome with a stupid fight scene in which they jump off a bloody cliff. I could not believe my eyes when I saw that. I was not amused.

They basically left out the whole story about Grindelwald and Dumbledore, hardly even mentioned Ariana and the rest of Dumbledore's past. What's the fucking point of introducing Grindelwald into part one if you're not going to explain any of it.
And I was kind of dissapointed by the lack of deaths we got to see. Not because I enjoy watching people die, but because I think they owed it to the characters. In the book, my favourite character Remus Lupin didn't get a death scene, I was very dissapointed by this and was hoping he would get one in the film. No one really did expect for the Death Eaters and Voldemort. Even when Fred died it was kind of like: You see Harry walk in. Fred is dead. He looks sad for a moment and then continues walking. That was very dissapointing.

I loved the fact that everyone applauded Mrs. Weasley for killing Bellatrix. She deserved it!
And oh my god if Alan Rickman does not get an oscar for his performance then I don't believe in oscars anymore. Because seriously, he was amazing! The way he portrayed Snape has always been great, but he blew my fucking mind with this. I would have liked the prince's tale to be a bit more detailed and longer but I enjoyed it nonetheless because Alan Rickman is such a boss! Honestly, I will gladly bow to him.

The epilogue was quite good! The children hardly said anything but I thought they aged them pretty well. And it was very emotional to see the children going off to Hogwarts. All in all, I enjoyed it. The book is 1000000000000 times better, but how could it ever live up to that?

My childhood is over now. It's time to grow up.

xx Eylinn

ps. I totally forgot to mention Harry walking to his death. TEARS. That is all.